Last week I wrote about my one true resolution for the year (liking myself) and it’s connection to my word for the year (happiness).
One thing I vowed to do was not weigh myself. While I know for certain I’m not at my ideal weight, I’m tired of being a slave to the scale. It’s not right for that number to have so much control over me.
I’d simply rather focus on healthy habits and not how much I weigh.
Turns out though, that’s really freaking hard.
I didn’t realize just how much that number of the scale rules my life. Like when I’d jump on the treadmill for a workout, how hard I pushed myself usually depended on my weight. Did I gain a little? Then I’d “punish” myself with a tougher workout.
So when I got on the treadmill to start day 1 of training for the half marathon I’m going to run, I felt like I didn’t know how hard to push myself. I didn’t know what my weight was, and my weight always told me what to do.
That’s kind of messed up.
But then something kind of incredible happened. I ran on the treadmill and I listened to my body. I mean, I really listened to it. I knew when I had more to give and I knew when I needed to let up. I was also able to truly feel how much the extra poundage I have affects my running.
If I was still weighing myself, I’d run to the scale right this minute. I’d know exactly how many calories to eat and how much I should workout. It’d be easy.
But I’d be miserable. And this is year of happiness, so that’s not an option. So I have to do something that feels a little scary. I just have to keep running and keep eating right and trust that it will be enough.
There’s no diet. There’s no special meal plan. There’s no weekly weigh-in or progress reports.
There’s only how I feel. There’s only the way I feel in my clothes. There’s only the way I feel during a run. But it’s enough.
So, au revoir bathroom scale. I officially no longer require your services.