Nothing gets my blood boiling quite like the debate about who works harder, moms with jobs or stay at home moms.
Because all moms work, and it’s a 24/7 gig. And it’s hard. It’s exhausting. It makes you question yourself. It can reduce you to tears at any moment.
And what do we do? Tear each other apart over it even more. It’s ridiculous and it has to stop.
There’s no question there are differences between the lives of moms who have jobs and moms who don’t. We use our time differently. We all have the same 24 hours in a day and we all have to figure out how to use them the best.
Moms who go to work everyday? I know you don’t have it easy leaving your kids in daycare. Even if daycare is a relative or loving friend, I don’t know how you do it. And even if you love your job, I know it’s still rough spending that much time away from your babies. And when you get home you have to squeeze in as much time with your kids as possible, while trying to get to all the stuff you didn’t do while you were at work. Talk about stressful. And do you ever get it all done? Hell no. Not even close.
And moms who stay at home all day? I wonder how we manage to do it too. There’s no escape. A solo trip to the bathroom? Forget about it. And you know how before you had kids you could sit down and have lunch? That’s cute. Now a baby will cry or a kid will throw up or someone will come whining at you because the dog ate his cracker. And even though logic would tell you we must have so much extra time to get the laundry done, somehow it never is actually done. Neither are the dishes. And are the toys ever picked up? Not a chance. The rugs vacuumed? Yeah right. Did we even bathe today? Outlook not good.
Yeah, our lives are different. Our priorities aren’t all the same. But that’s okay. It’s no reason to fight. Because at the end of the day we probably all go to bed wondering how we could have done better. How we could have fit even more into our day. That’s what moms do.
I know this post won’t magically end the war. But sometimes you have to draw a line in the sand and pick a side. And the side I pick is moms.
All of them.
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Yes!!! I am SO tired of all the comparing, arguing, and judging that goes on between moms. We need to be encouraging and lifting each other up instead!
Jessica recently posted…2014
Love this.
BION I’m impressed! Cool post!
The world needs both types of moms for very special reasons.
Kendra recently posted…Top 10 Most Visited Posts for 2013
So perfectly put, Trish. I’m a strong believer that every family has the right – and responsibility – to do what’s best for their family. Stay at home mom? Stay at home dad? Home office parents? Whatever it is, no one has the right to judge or condemn someone else’s choice. I’m with you – let’s support moms (and dads) and stop this ridiculous argument!
Mo at Mocadeaux recently posted…Making Predictions And Scoring Points
Amen! You preach it, girl! I’m not even a mom yet but I totally agree with you!
Susannah recently posted…Work My Closet: Tribal Print Dress
You are so right Trish! I’ve been a ‘working’ mom and a SAHM and they both are hard in their own right. They both have advantages and disadvantages, and yes, I think we ALL go to bed each night wondering how bad we may be screwing things up! All moms (and dads) need support, b/c it really does ‘take a village’.
Kim of Mo’Betta recently posted…Top 10 Recipes of 2013
Amen, my friend. A-Men.
The same can be applied to those of us who are not moms yet (or choose not to be) and are given crap for choosing to stay home or have to for some reason. Moms or not we all have our issues and daily battles to fight. There’s no need for an Us vs. Them mentality whether we stay at home or choose to work.
Kim recently posted…If I See “Pin-Worthy” One More Time…
I’m not sure where the career mom vs stay-at-home mom debate started, but it’s pretty ridiculous. Being a mom is hard enough as it is without being told by others that you’re doing it wrong (whatever way it is), especially by other moms. If we took all this energy to be negative and judgmental to something positive, maybe we’d cure a major disease out there. 🙂
(ps. I’m coming here from the social media sunday linkup, glad to have found your blog!)
Roaen recently posted…A Healthier Me: Goals for 2014
I’ve been both and right now I’m on the side of the moms!!!
I never understood this debate and suspect it may stem from insecurity and lack of validation on either side.
All moms work hard; struggle with if they are doing the right thing; and reap immense rewards from the journey of parenthood.
nylse recently posted…Pray Requests