I have 90 drafted blog posts. Ninety. That’s a nine with a zero after it. Most of them are almost ready. Just a little tweak here or there and they’d be ready for me to hit the publish button. But I let them sit there, unable to convince myself they’re good enough. I mean, who do I think I am thinking anyone wants to read what I have to say?
That self-doubt, she’s a real Debbie Downer.
And it doesn’t just attack my blogging. You should hear the struggle in my head about photography. I love taking pictures. When I pull out my camera, I feel genuinely excited. I am having the best time learning about photography and how to get the shots I want and how to edit them. Until the self-doubt creeps in. And then I don’t pull my camera out so freely. I look at every shot with such a critical eye that there’s no way it could ever be good enough. The fun stops.
And I’m left wondering why I do this to myself. Why can I feel so confident in my abilities one day, and the next have no faith in myself? Because I think I could really have something here. This blog. My photography. It’s worth something. It’s an opportunity I don’t want to let slip through my fingers while I’m doubting myself.
But every time I sit down to write a post or turn on the camera, the struggle continues. I fight to dial back that self-doubt and remind myself that I am actually worth believing in.
So why am I suddenly confessing all of this? Because I know I’m not alone. And I know how lonely self-doubt can leave you. Because you don’t want to admit to anyone that you have a hard time believing in yourself. It feels a little shameful, doesn’t it? Especially in this world, where exclamations of success and confidence are just a tweet or a Facebook update a way. I think we’re often left with the impression that everyone else can do it except for us.
And it’s just not true. We’re amazing, talented, capable, and driven people. There’s nothing we can’t do if we’re determined to make it happen. And if you’re down in that self-doubt pit like I find myself in sometimes, and you just can’t believe those words, find someone who will remind you. E-mail me if you want to. I’ll have no trouble telling you how amazing I think you are.
Let’s just start believing in ourselves and making great things happen. Who’s with me?